welcome

Call me Sueyi.
Call me Sue-Sue.
Call me Sue.
Just don't call me lil fry.

A 19 yr old :

Finding her niche in the passionate world of white coats and stethoscopes.

Missing Malaysian food so badly, that she drowns her sorrow by surfing food blogs.

Who watches scary movies only with friends who have high pain threshold (from all that pinching)

Who has very cold extremities, ask my stimulated patients, oops sorry, "simulated patients"

Who loves a good laugh with candid, thick-skinned friends

Who cannot stay surrounded by 4 walls for more than a few hours

Who loves her loved ones so so much


:)

shout outs



endless wishes

char siew bao.

blueberry muffins.

hot Milo and crackers.

a neverending supply of Daddy's socks.

Bear hugs. Warm kisses. Lots of Love.

My own beach chalet.

Bubble baths.

Shining sun and rainbows.

Sexy stilettos.

Dancing.

Me

I wear socks.Even with heels.

I play with my earlobes.

I have a Mongolian mole.

My family means the world to me. "Family means no one gets left behind"

I like cheekiness. You cheeky, me cheeky.

I heart my close friends, the ones who know me in and out, the ones who've grown with me.

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and when she speaks

Monday, September 26, 2011

I was on Palliative Care a week ago.

I was given a consult on a patient whose name was familiar. When I looked her up, I soon realised she was someone I had taken care of - for 3 weeks about 2 months ago, when I was on the general medicine floors.

I had grown to bond with her husband and her family, who were there everyday by her side- whilst she was fighting off complications from her disease; pancreatic cancer with metastases.
That disease carries a grave prognosis. But she is a trooper, and her family is an amazing support.
Collectively, she has made it through these past few months and done pretty well, despite the short survival rate these patients typically carry.

Her objective is to make it through to see her son's wedding.
Her indomitable sense of will and determined strength are factors that I believe more powerful than anything medicine can do for you; and I sincerely hope that that will see her through to her desired wish.

Being on palliative care taught me a few things I never knew about the dying.
1) There is such a thing as "unfinished business". There was a patient whose care was withdrawn after a painful decision by her family members. She made it through 3 weeks after her ventilator was taken off. She was waiting for something, and after it happened, she breathed her last.
2) Sometimes they hold on, painfully - because they know their family members are not ready for them to go. So they hold on to life, struggling and suffering. After some counselling from the Palliative Care team for the family, when they are ready to let go of their dying one, we let them know that they should tell their dying loved one that it is OK to go; that they grant the patient permission and reassurance to go, that they will do alright. Once that is said and mentioned, the dying ones usually go pretty quickly.

I was scared at first when I heard of that. But it is true, again, I am sure, the human spirit and strengh is more powerful than anything medicine can do for them- to keep them going.
The most common reason that these patients hold on is I find, usually in the name of family love.

It's nothing like love for your loved ones- to keep you fighting, despite all odds, isn't it?
Strange how the world works, but hey, you can call me a believer- but I believe prayers and the human spirit can withstand and accomplish anything, and surpass expectations.

Anyway, back to my patient; they remembered me. Her husband called me out, fondly "You remember Dr. Lai?" to my patient.

One morning, when I walked in with my boss and team from Palliative Care; he asked my attending "Are you her boss?". Dr Yeow nodded yes, and he responded "Dr. Lai here is amazing. You need to know that", whilst pointing to me- and that made my heart smile with so much warmth and gratitude.

My prayers are with their entire family, for seeing her through to the wedding and perhaps, longer :)
Keeping my fingers crossed- and yes, I AM a believer.


her
STORY,
her ALIBIS
7:16 AM;;