and when she speaks
Saturday, September 11, 2010
A smile is the light in the window of your face that tells people you're at home.
Life is slippery. Here, take my hand.
I saw her walking down the hallway, back from her clinic. She hadn't had lunch yet but agreed to meet with me. I scrambled through my bag for my emergency stack of Hersheys' but found only one- because I had been nibbling and sharing these over my study date sessions *laughs*... Passed one baby Hershey into her hand, and she flashed me a big smile.
I'm so glad I made the initiative to meet with her. She was very reassuring, I definitely felt much better after the meeting. Inspired nonetheless. The people in heme/onc are the nicest, most wonderful people. Time and time I say that again, I really feel I belong. I only hope to learn from the best and can only aspire to be like them in the near future.
She was so comforting. "If you really want it, and you are determined and willing to work hard, you'll definitely get it". I had exposed I was nervous for the process. She calmed the little storm in me and gave me more confidence, and certainly made me feel more reassured. I think the people in heme/onc have that in them, they all have this comforting, warm aura. I love it :)
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4:01 AM;;
Friday, September 10, 2010
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11:45 AM;;
Thursday, September 09, 2010
It's amazing how simple, small things in life can give you so much joy.
I came across this blog that touched on heartfelt, simple pleasures she finds in her surroundings everyday.. And this is what she shared with her readers : (p.s. I love all these quaint inspirational sayings)
"Look at everything as though you were seeing it either for the first or last time" Betty Smith
"Have a heart that never hardens, a temper that never tries, a touch that never hurts" Charles Dickens
"The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt within the heart. No pessimist ever discovered the secret of the stars, or sailed to an uncharted land, or opened a new doorway for the human spirit." Helen Keller
I'm happy because:-
I have McVities in my cupboard for my supper snack (when I'm working with the absurd amount of papers strewn all over my dining table) =) *my favourite British biscuits* mmm :)
I'm going for frozen yogurt topped with fresh raspberries, blueberries and mango slices later :)
I have nice work slacks from French Connection (that were on sale!) :) but I got them tailored by my favorite Korean lady back at my old place. She's so cute! She said to me 'Oh you're too pretty to be a doctor. You look like a model.' I laughed and said 'I sure don't fit the height criteria' and she knows it too (since she had to take off 3-4 inches off my slacks! -.-') ;)
I had pancakes the other day after craving for it for ages! Pancakes with cinnamon and apples :)
My study dates have been extremely constructive :) We hop from spot to spot: Argo tea (a quiet one ;)), Millenium Park by the Bean under the umbrella, on my friend's rooftop under the shining sun. Sometimes armed with mango bubble tea, hot chai tea, ice matte latte, the badly-needed wake me-upper Large coffee, or just plain-home cooked food :) And I have another friend who's just been recruited as another study date partner! *hearts* Studying becomes so much more fun with great company!
Desserts- always make me happy :) Chocolate brownie with vanilla ice cream, caramel fudge pie... and Teng's birthday cake :) :) Oh-not to forget birthday celebrations where friends gather together :)
My mooncake's about to arrive. Mummy tried sending it over but they were giving her so much paperwork so in the end, she got YIYI's company to fedex it over! I laughed and said 'Chinatown has them too!' but she said 'it always taste better when its sent from home with love'. How true. Love my family to bits! =)
My seniors who are no more in Chicago whom I still keep in touch with, called the other day. Vijai was so nice, he joked to me 'LIAR (his fond nickname for me), you're too young to settle. Don't have a boyfriend til 4-5 years later!' I was like 'What, VIJAI?! Then Ill be 28!' He said 'So?' Ohhh Vijai, the protective big brother and amazingly wonderful mentor. Hilda wants me to apply to Minnesota so I can stay over at her place. I'd sure love to!
My LA friend who is slogging this entire weekend, working 48 hours straight just so he'll be free for the next weekend when Im heading over (for 1.5 days total). Doctors' schedules are always so hard to work around! But I can't wait! *hehe*!
Realising that I've really grown up a lot these past few months and learnt a lot. Mostly in interpersonal relationships and in knowing more about myself. The hardest bit is dealing with issues that relate to the heart, when emotions are involved, there's bound to be heartache. But that serves to strengthen you. I think what's important later on is that we all learn to look beyond the past and grow up individually and learn from the experience. And hopefully, not have to burn bridges.. but that takes a lot of time. Im proud that I am beginning to see clearly what I value most around me, and what I need in my life. And that right now, my biggest aspiration is to get into oncology. So I can fulfil my dream of serving my patients in that field =)
It's my calling.
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11:52 AM;;
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Tuesday, September 07, 2010
Closed one chapter. Here's to the beginning of an exciting one. Life is all about choosing your ride. But sometimes you don't have a choice- you find yourself thrown into one, but the fun's all in putting yourself out there, enjoying the ride, and learning from the wrong roads that you take. It's important to realize if you don't make mistakes, you will never learn. Mummy said to me the other day : 'Don't be disappointed. That's how you learn, both about yourself and others. That's how you improve on your weaknesses and grow up. It's called life experience. If you don't make mistakes, you don't learn. So open yourself to life. Of course, learn from your mistakes but go out there, embrace your present and don't live in the past'. I heart you mummy :) You are one wise woman ;) *She sure knows how to kick my ass with her one-liners too* But I need to be brought down to earth once in awhile when my feet are off the ground. On another note:Had amazing caramel chocolate fudge pie and chocolate brownie with ice cream on Friday night. They wouldn't stop poking fun at me regarding my love for desserts but I couldn't care less. Nothing comes between me and my desserts :) Saturday, did a bit of work in the hospital. Had a study date with a girlfriend :) at Argo Tea... Lots of BBQ meals (*ugh* no more!). Brunch at Eggsperience (thumbs-down unfortunately!). Walking out downtown with a friend. The walk in the warm breeze was refreshing. I need to do it more often before it gets brutally cold! Then, took a detour and studied in Millenium Park by the Bean, enjoying great company. Had a great home-cooked meal by Zoe and Cheah yesterday night with Bak kut teh, curry fish, BBQ pork, mooncake- the tummy was extremely satisfied :) Thanks Zoe for organising! :) Skyped with baby (sister!) today. Baby was being so cute. My sisters are all growing up so quickly and I am so incredibly proud of all of them. The other day, a close friend was on Skype telling me about his father who was ill. I've said this many times, but it's true. You never know what can happen next. It's so important to let your loved ones know you appreciate them, and to live in the present moment. Carpe diem. To live life to the fullest everyday. There is so much out there in the world to enjoy. Living in the memories from the past is a waste of time. Why torture yourself? You need to let go, heal, and move forward. Life is beckoning for you. There will always be down moments and sad times, but move on. Your happiness requires you to make a conscious effort. I thank god I have such an amazing supportive family. Wonderful, caring friends who are my family here away from home. And an even more amazing career. So go out there and enjoy life! Don't waste anymore precious moments :) *hearts*
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9:53 AM;;