Call me Sueyi.
Call me Sue-Sue.
Call me Sue.
Just don't call me lil fry.

A 19 yr old :

Finding her niche in the passionate world of white coats and stethoscopes.

Missing Malaysian food so badly, that she drowns her sorrow by surfing food blogs.

Who watches scary movies only with friends who have high pain threshold (from all that pinching)

Who has very cold extremities, ask my stimulated patients, oops sorry, "simulated patients"

Who loves a good laugh with candid, thick-skinned friends

Who cannot stay surrounded by 4 walls for more than a few hours

Who loves her loved ones so so much


shout outs

endless wishes

char siew bao.

blueberry muffins.

hot Milo and crackers.

a neverending supply of Daddy's socks.

Bear hugs. Warm kisses. Lots of Love.

My own beach chalet.

Bubble baths.

Shining sun and rainbows.

Sexy stilettos.



I wear socks.Even with heels.

I play with my earlobes.

I have a Mongolian mole.

My family means the world to me. "Family means no one gets left behind"

I like cheekiness. You cheeky, me cheeky.

I heart my close friends, the ones who know me in and out, the ones who've grown with me.


July 1, 2007

July 8, 2007

July 15, 2007

July 22, 2007

July 29, 2007

August 5, 2007

August 12, 2007

August 19, 2007

August 26, 2007

September 2, 2007

September 9, 2007

September 16, 2007

September 23, 2007

September 30, 2007

October 7, 2007

October 14, 2007

October 21, 2007

October 28, 2007

November 4, 2007

November 11, 2007

November 18, 2007

November 25, 2007

December 2, 2007

December 9, 2007

December 16, 2007

December 23, 2007

January 6, 2008

January 13, 2008

January 20, 2008

January 27, 2008

February 3, 2008

February 10, 2008

February 17, 2008

February 24, 2008

March 2, 2008

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March 16, 2008

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March 30, 2008

April 6, 2008

April 13, 2008

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April 27, 2008

May 4, 2008

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June 1, 2008

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June 29, 2008

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August 3, 2008

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August 31, 2008

September 7, 2008

September 14, 2008

September 28, 2008

October 5, 2008

October 12, 2008

October 19, 2008

October 26, 2008

November 2, 2008

November 9, 2008

November 16, 2008

November 23, 2008

November 30, 2008

December 7, 2008

December 14, 2008

December 21, 2008

December 28, 2008

January 4, 2009

January 11, 2009

January 18, 2009

January 25, 2009

February 1, 2009

February 8, 2009

February 15, 2009

February 22, 2009

March 1, 2009

March 8, 2009

March 15, 2009

March 22, 2009

March 29, 2009

April 5, 2009

April 12, 2009

April 19, 2009

April 26, 2009

May 3, 2009

May 10, 2009

May 17, 2009

May 24, 2009

May 31, 2009

June 7, 2009

June 14, 2009

June 21, 2009

June 28, 2009

July 5, 2009

July 12, 2009

July 19, 2009

July 26, 2009

August 2, 2009

August 9, 2009

August 16, 2009

August 23, 2009

August 30, 2009

September 6, 2009

September 13, 2009

September 20, 2009

October 4, 2009

October 11, 2009

October 18, 2009

October 25, 2009

November 1, 2009

November 8, 2009

November 22, 2009

November 29, 2009

December 6, 2009

December 13, 2009

December 20, 2009

January 31, 2010

February 28, 2010

March 14, 2010

March 21, 2010

March 28, 2010

April 4, 2010

May 9, 2010

May 23, 2010

May 30, 2010

June 6, 2010

July 11, 2010

July 18, 2010

July 25, 2010

August 1, 2010

August 8, 2010

August 15, 2010

August 22, 2010

August 29, 2010

September 5, 2010

September 26, 2010

October 3, 2010

October 10, 2010

October 17, 2010

October 24, 2010

October 31, 2010

November 7, 2010

November 14, 2010

November 21, 2010

November 28, 2010

December 5, 2010

December 19, 2010

December 26, 2010

January 9, 2011

January 16, 2011

January 23, 2011

February 13, 2011

February 20, 2011

February 27, 2011

March 6, 2011

March 13, 2011

March 20, 2011

April 3, 2011

April 10, 2011

April 24, 2011

May 15, 2011

May 22, 2011

May 29, 2011

June 5, 2011

June 19, 2011

July 10, 2011

July 17, 2011

July 24, 2011

July 31, 2011

August 7, 2011

August 14, 2011

August 28, 2011

September 4, 2011

September 11, 2011

September 18, 2011

September 25, 2011

October 2, 2011

October 16, 2011

October 23, 2011

October 30, 2011

November 6, 2011

November 13, 2011

November 20, 2011

January 8, 2012

January 29, 2012

February 5, 2012

March 11, 2012

March 18, 2012

March 25, 2012

July 8, 2012

July 22, 2012

August 5, 2012

August 12, 2012

September 2, 2012

September 16, 2012

September 30, 2012

October 7, 2012

October 14, 2012

October 21, 2012

October 28, 2012

November 11, 2012

September 8, 2013

September 29, 2013

January 5, 2014

January 26, 2014

February 16, 2014

July 27, 2014

August 17, 2014

August 24, 2014

November 16, 2014

December 7, 2014

February 22, 2015

March 1, 2015

and when she speaks

Saturday, October 16, 2010

10:01 PM;;

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Mariam and I feel like we've been in the hospital everyday since we started this rotation. I couldn't agree more. I haven't seen Christine in a month - outside of the hospital. And inside the hospital, I've only seen her twice- once for lunch for like 15 minutes, and the second time was yesterday during our brutal 8 hour exam... -.-' and now I'm on call------ and counting down!

But plans are coming up! THank goodness- I deserve it, really. Sai sent an email out to the team for a team dinner next Friday. Her email cracked me up... She was saying how me/Sharon (my intern) we're the MICU on our floor! WE are the blackest clouds on 10/11! Either we get slammed with admits, or we get extremely sick/unstable patients =( and everybody else only gets 3-4 admits... :(

This Friday:- Dinner with Aaron and friends (FRENCH Belgian!) at Home Bistro
Saturday: Celebrating dear Yvonne's Birthday with Malaysian food!!
Sunday- CALL :(
Monday- Post-call but another doctor's talk at Harry Caray's Steakhouse with the FLIP gang :)
Friday- Post-call ALSO but I'm presenting at Northwestern University - so, I'll be without sleep from Thursday 6am til Friday 7.30pm when the competition ends. Followed by TEAM Dinner at Valencia or Babareeba! So- no SLEEP for ~ 50 plus hours. CRAZY! But I'm looking forward to Friday! :)

4:28 PM;;

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

I am so thankful for having such amazing friends. This goes out to Aaron, Chee and Beth for being there that night *thank you so much* :)

This morning, I woke up to mummy writing on my facebook profile statement:

"Hi luv hope all goes well for u luv. Don't worry luv luck is always by your side, you are a wonderful doctor. It's your calling. You will do well, remember every obstacle will only make u more resilient. luv u lots"

That was so sweet of her :)
On a great note, my patients in clinic are doing so well! Today the second patient said to her niece in front of me "Oh, I love my doctor!"
She was almost in tears in the exam room because she has done so well.
I'm so proud of her.
I love what I do.

6:47 AM;;

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Everyday is a learning curve- only it can be so steep sometimes. Especially because lives are in your hands.

And you end up questioning your decisions. Even more so when it's so acute, that you really just have to do what you have to do.

I guess what's most important is that we all learn something from it for the next one to come.

8:40 AM;;

Monday, October 11, 2010

Carrot nut muffin was my breakfast on call =)
My intern paged me this morning post-call after a crazy night,
"I bought a bagel for you. I'm on 11K"

*smiles* How sweet :)

Last night, or rather after midnight on 10/10/10- everything went crazy. Patients were crashing on me. Blood Pressure dropping, not responding to fluids!

I transferred 3 down to the ICU (the very last transfer was almost a CODE! As soon as that patient went down, and I came back up to the floors, I heard them page overhead 'Anesthesia On call' THREE times') - I knew that was the patient I had just sent down in the nick of time.

When I was transferring the second one down to the ICU and following that patient down in the elevator- my pager went off - ANOTHER patient became acutely unresponsive, febrile, hypertensive from baseline of sBP 110s to 180s - and started desaturating to the 80s. He was rock solid the entire day until 5 ish am. Just went I thought transferring 2 patients down before 6am, I had an hour of peace before the teams came to work- this guy crashed on me.

Could feel his pulse- but it was so faint. I was talking to him 'Mr..., stay with me. Squeeze my fingers'. He was awake, but there was no response from his fingers. He was mumbling and somnolent.

Tried to get an ABG. Couldn't. The BP cuff could not get a reading, despite changing the machines twice.

It was havoc. But we got a BP from the cuff over his leg with a SBP of 140.
Next thing I knew, when the nurses came from the ICU to collect him, his BP was barely palpable. How could it have dropped so quickly when just minutes ago I felt his peripheral pulses? We called Pharmacy to tube up Levophed to us- earlier just in case but it wasn't tubed on time. So then I said to 'run fluids wide open STAT'.

Crazy night. But I felt like a real senior. Definitely, was an eventful night- but I left feeling more capable than I've ever felt.

With patients crashing on you, everyone looks to you to make the decisions.
There is no time to worry or feel stressed. You do what you need to do to get them stable.
Priority # 1.

Came home, showered- next thing I knew I fell asleep for 5 hours straight on my bed with the towel still wrapped on my head *laughs*!

I didn't even realize how exhausted I was. But it was a great great call.
My colleagues saw me this morning when the crash cart was outside that patient's room- and later came up to me 'Sueyi, what luck you have! Slammed on my first 2 calls. And with this call, no new admits, but super super sick patients!'

I laughed.....

Bring on the challenges. I felt like a real doctor- making decisions that make the difference between life and death - in acute situations.

*damn, I actually feel good* *laughs*

Sai said this to me this morning when I signed out: 'Sueyi, you have so much going for you.'

I smiled at her and kept that resonating at the back of my head.
I'm pretty damn proud of myself. I gave her a high five and left the floor.

- Sai Hei got me a sugar cookie as a treat! And Beth was so sweet, said she wants to bring me food for dinner! - What amazing, caring friends! :)

8:20 AM;;

Sunday, October 10, 2010

I'm lucky.

I have love from my family and terrific caring supportive friends.
Friends from all over the world, who have always been there for me. Even when I make silly mistakes. Even when I've constantly pestered them. Friends who listen, and tell me what I need to hear. Friends who have stuck by me for more than a decade *haha* Friends who understand me and believe in me. Friends who comfort me, and are always willing to provide that supportive ear/shoulder. I don't know what I do to deserve them- both my family and friends.

And I love my job.

I feel so blessed. I have so much going for me, and I am very very thankful.

I'm typing this in the call room- and despite being on call, it's been a great day.

Benson pat my shoulder when I said 'Oh F! (cos I thought with the CCU and ICU being full, they'll transfer to us *shudder*)' *laughs* Then, he left me his dark-chocolate raisins in the call room! *and I finished them already!!* :)
Dr Leslie joking saying 'It'll make your career if this gets published in BLOOD!' I laughed and hoped inside and crossed my fingers!
James calling me 'Su-YEI!' and I corrected him 'SUE-YI!'.
Sharon (my intern) being so funny and not embarassed to say 'I'll BLOCK all ADMITS!' at the top of her voice.
My patient always smiling when I see her.
A text from Evan this morning - about being strong for the people we care around us.
My two amazing friends with plumber-like skills unclogging my bath-tub last night. It was so sweet of them to come in such short notice! ;) Thanks Cheah and Sai Hei!
Aaron volunteering to be Ahmed- ;) *driver* for food outings!
Elaine sending me a private email inviting me to the 'most important day of her life'- for her wedding next year in Kuching. Mum gave her approval! :)
Hilda's phone call yesterday and ever supportive heart-and honesty. She said 'COME TO MINNESOTA, Sueyi!'

There will always be people who walk in and out of your life.
I'm a person who will avoid conflicts. I have this (call me naive) mindset where I hope everyone gets along with everyone, but we all know that's not the real world. I've learnt it's important to see people for their strengths and to give everyone a chance, including yourself. Life is so short, so precious. Fill it up and make the conscious effort to show your loved ones you appreciate them, you love them, you care for them. And go and enjoy what life has to offer =) and don't be afraid to chase your dreams, and be the very best you can be.

Lots of love

4:33 AM;;

Yesterday, I went for Korean BBQ with Aaron, Beth, Su Meng and Raymond @ San Soo Gab San.
We stuffed ourselves silly - and smelt like BBQ after! *teehee*

Before that though, I came down in the elevator in my building with a bunch of people in their 20s.
I walked out of my building waiting for Aaron to come pick me up. Whilst standing on the side lane, one of the guys who were in the elevator looked at me who was now on his own, jokingly asked 'Waiting for me?'

I laughed and shook my head no
He laughed back, saying 'I'm just kidding'.
Then he walked over to me, and introduced himself and stuck his hand out for a handshake.
"Hi, my name is .... What's yours?"
So I went "Hi, I'm Sueyi"

He continued with further introductions and casual questions. 'So do you live here?'
"Yeah, I rent an apartment here"
"How do you like it?"
"I like it"

"I was looking to buy an apartment in this building...I already have two in the city, and I wasn't sure if I wanted to get one here."
We went on for a few minutes talking about the apartment. Then, he told me he had just purchased an apartment in my building and told me his Apt #. I asked if he had a view of the lake, he replied YES. "Good!" And I gave a thumbs up. Then, he told me 'I'll be throwing lots of parties and I'll invite you.'
I smiled back.

Then, he gave me a smile and said 'I hope to see you around.'

;) *innocent flirting*

2:39 AM;;