and when she speaks
Saturday, November 05, 2011
We all have our own life to pursue,
our own kind of dreams to be weaving,
and we all have the power to make wishes come true,
as long as we keep believing.
her
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1:24 PM;;
I owe my friends here, so much.I guess tonight's just one of those nights- where I sit, here in the comforts of my apartment, thinking deeply, reflecting, dreaming, reminiscing, and wondering... Listening to nostalgic songs, just triggered a somewhat melancholic feeling. I guess, this bears a similarity to when I call my baby sister "emo" *laughs* I'm looking back, at the wonderful times I've shared with my friends here- who've really been with me through thick and thin. A particular group. Who've listened to me cry, pulled me up - back to ground level, and stayed by my side literally during trying times. I am really thankful, for the people I have surrounding me, who are my support pillars here.If you're ever reading this, thank you for being there. *I heart you guys*
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1:18 PM;;
Dr Billhardt (totally uncharacteristic of him for the following)- and so out of the blue when this statement popped:"Sueyi, your metabolism is like a hummingbird........" - then- followed by this:"You probably need 50,000 calories to keep up with your activity!"OMG. It cracked all of us up. I thought he was so hilarious and so cute to have said that, AND on my very last day too, on cardiology!I like how I have that effect on people, as Christine puts it. As long as I bring a smile to their faces, help them lighten up, or if they can crack up just teasing me :) I don't mind it one bit. Dr Calvin listened to my heart, because I had requested for that. So I may have a "click". But now, I am reassured :) No more fears that sometimes crop up, and scare me about my own health.
her
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1:07 PM;;
her
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1:01 PM;;
Tears welled up in his eyes.
Tears were streaming down hers. His hands were gently stroking the left side of her cheek, whilst he stood, towering over her. Comforting her as best as he could, whilst he tried to grasp the reality of the situation.She laid there, on the hospital bed, in the surgical intensive care unit, unable to move the right side of her face, her body. Completely paralyzed, on that half of her body. She's only 20 years old, completely healthy before, with no past medical history. One evening, she went to bed, and woke up unable to speak, with facial droop and complete weakness on her right side. Imagine the fearful thoughts running through her mind then. Imagine thoughts of your whole life flashing by, in front of you... Your whole life changed, unexpectedly, one day when you wake up. Never again the same.Terrifying.Here he was, by her side. Her boyfriend. So loving, trying his best to hold himself together to be strong for her. I watched him there everyday. He was there everyday, without fail.The show of love, concern and support was more than evident.He truly cared for her. She did tremendously well, over the next few days. The fact that a 20 year old who was living a completely normal life before, came in with a stroke- blew our minds. But it turns out she has a hole in her heart. Her symptoms improved significantly. Initially, she couldn't even lift her right arm off the bed. When she started regaining strength, we taught her to speak again. She couldn't remember how to brush her teeth. But by day 3, her boyfriend had brought her a book on animals- and she could barely form the word "fox".By close to the end of the first week, she could "high five" me. One fine day, I walked in there to examine her, after I had explained about what our plans were for her heart, she suddenly exclaimed 'Oh ok'. My eyes opened wide in surprise. She spoke. That was when my hands instinctively went up for a high five from her, and guess what? Her right hand rose up for mine. My heart skipped a beat of joy and happiness for her.I smiled so widely. *laughs*Her uncle wanted me to sit next to her for a photo. I graciously said no, and offered to take their family picture, but he wouldn't take NO from me :)SO I plonked myself next to her, and wrapped my arm around her- and we both smiled for the camera.He showed me the picture and said 'Look, 2 pretty girls'. I laughed and said 'No, 3 pretty girls- look her mum was behind us' - and the whole room laughed in sync.What a happy, joyful moment :)I couldn't be happier for her, my dear girl.
Her family was the perfect example of how love pulled them all together, and made her stronger. I watched how her young boyfriend, probably only in his early 20s, stepped up and became the most supportive, responsible, caring lover- and it made my heart warm up on the inside :)
her
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12:42 PM;;
Wednesday, November 02, 2011
Happy Halloween! :)))))) *something I came up with after I found out the birthday dinner I was attending that night had a theme* - so I googled halloween eye make-up, and VOILA! :)
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11:19 AM;;
The other day, I had a new patient come in to see me in my clinic. I am sure he did not expect what was in place for him, as his physician.Here was a young 30 year old male who had many medical conditions. Only 30- but he had diabetes, hypertension and depression. He came in to see me to establish care with a new primary care physician- which is my role, essentially. After almost halfway into the allocated time slot, he revealed he had a problem, just when I thought I was close to being done with history taking.A problem, he had shared with his endocrinologist earlier that day, but said he will discuss with his new doctor- ME, in this case. That problem, was of his erectile dysfunction (ED). Now, you get why I said he must have not expected to see me, a "relatively" young female physician to discuss his "presenting complaint" with. He was very very ashamed and embarassed, needless to say. I comforted him, and tried my very best to make that conversation one that was very casual, as if I see about 20 patients with ED everyday in my line of work. I wanted him as comfortable and as not awkward as possible, but it was about his manhood- that to him, has "failed". (Although it is more, as my boss puts it, 'it's not broken, it's just a little off, we will fix it'.)As I found out- it began 4 years ago, when he caught his wife cheating on him. After that day, he said it just never worked like it used to. My heart broke when I heard that.Here was a relatively good-looking, fit young man, who had no esteem because of a cheating spouse- of infidelityAs my boss expected, all our blood work came back normal- that it is all psychogenic in etiology. He is now seeing a counsellor to help him get back on track to living life. I only hope that he realizes that he is worthy of having a normal, healthy relationship with a loving person... that his old spouse was a horrible horrible person... that he deserves so much more. I hope he sees that it has been four years now, and that he should at least grant himself the opportunity to let go of the past, love himself and create a better future ahead of him.
her
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11:03 AM;;
